Diana Princess of Wales: The Drama Triangle part 3

Live Holistically is a multi-author site.
This post was written by: Carol Webb

The Helper
In my previous post about Diana Princess of Wales, I wrote about her position as Persecutor on the Karpman Drama Triangle, in this post let’s explore the more controversial Helpers position.

Can there be anything wrong with wanting to help?

Everyone Knows a Helper
To my mind this position is the most insidious. We all know them, the teachers, social workers, nurses, doctors, healers, local councillors, care assistants, charity workers and emergency teams such as fire fighters and police, and these are only the professional ones, who live self-less lives, helping others. They often get an O.B.E. or some other public citation for their pains, which is the pinnacle of their career, and becomes a story to dine out on.

The Un-Paid Helpers
Every family has an un-paid helper, always ready to organize a party, look after Aunty Flo., nurture the sick and pity the pauper, but do you really like what they are?

When all these people are doing all these things, who are they helping? They are helping themselves.

The Persecuted Professionals
How many times have you seen newspaper headlines proclaiming that:

1. Nurses and Doctors have been abused by drunks in accident and emergency departments of hospitals.
2. Teachers abused, sometimes even killed by their pupils.
3. Social Workers abused with doors slammed in their faces.
4. Fire Fighters stoned as they put out fires.
5. Local Councillors blamed for all the ills of the neighbourhood.
6. Care Assistants sworn at and kicked by the old people they are meant to care for.
7. Doctors blamed for the death of a loved one.
8. Charity workers accused of stealing donations.
9. Policemen and women spat at and abused.
10. Healers accused of quackery.

The List
This list could go on and on. We read the stories of these people who were, only trying to help, and shake our heads at a society that could sink so low. When all the time we have the truth of the matter at our finger tips. The helpers that received this treatment were living their lives on the model of the Drama Triangle, and in doing so these atrocities were bound to happen. It was only a matter of time.

To complicate matters a little, there are 3 degrees of the 3 positions:

1. Victim low/medium/high
2. Persecutor low/medium/high
3. Helper low/medium/high

The 3rd degree or high position will often end in death, the other 2 in psychological trauma or physical trauma, but recoverable.

Society Needs Them
We certainly need all these jobs taken care of in society, it would probably grind to a halt without them. Sadly helpers don’t usually know that they are fulfilling their need for recognition, praise and having a place in society. The ego of a helper being massaged by their admirers is the way that they use to re-fill their own energy banks, a way for them to survive.

The Perfect Example
Diana, Princess of Wales was a perfect example of the 3rd degree Helper.

We already know that she craved attention by starving herself, attempted suicide by throwing herself down stairs and sabotaged her place in society by exhibitionist behaviour. Every position that Diana took was 3rd degree. The outcome had to be an early death, whether it was from being hounded by the press, or a more sinister assassination by Price Charles, it was inevitable.

Diana’s one solace in life was her position as Helper.

Love for Her Charity Work
She revelled in her charity work. Iconically holding the hands of lepers and Aids sufferers, cuddling starving babies and popping up in the midst of other people’s life crises. Desperate for praise, and receiving it from a besotted press, who would say and do anything for a good photograph. Diana on the front page always sold newspapers. With this constant publicity the public believed in her caring roll, and poured energy in her direction.

As her position within the Royal Family worsened, her charities became more extreme. Walking in an only partially cleared minefield, was an analogy for her life. She got away with it for a time, but eventually she succumbed.

Diana’s Last Action
The last desperate action that she had planned was to become an icon for all the refugees of this world, she actually thought that she could start a campaign in Palestine, in a refugee camp in Gaza or the West Bank, and get away with it. Her message was to be:

“This misery must come to an end, these children must no longer live under such conditions.”

Words that were broadcast to the world via a German TV Documentary in 2003, but known to her aids just before she died.

Diana would have loved her funeral, ironically planned as the Queen Mother’s own, with a few additions to the choice of music. It sealed her status as “The People’s Princess”, a role that she cherished and learned by heart.

Are You a Helper?
If you are a Helper, professional or un-paid, and have been persecuted at any time, or remember saying, “After all that I’ve done for him/her, and this is the way they treat me.” It is important that you learn how to remove yourself from the triangle. You can do this by becoming aware of your situation, visit: http://www.wisehealer.co.uk where you will find ways to contact me.

It is still possible to retain a helping career without being persecuted or becoming a victim, my own career as a healer had to be put on hold until I learned to live outside the triangle. My husband was also a professional Helper, a teacher, who needed to learn a different way to feel fulfilled.

If you haven’t got these books yet I recommend that you get them as soon as you can. Everyone needs to read and know this information, about themselves, and the way that society works.